Tony Greenway writes... Dear John You don't know me, but I have been an Ardant (ha, ha... geddit?) admirer of your work for, ooh, at least three minutes now. I found your biography of orange-faced entertainer Ross King especially informative. I had NO idea about that business with the dwarf and the tin of Swarfega, for instance. Or am I thinking of someone else? Anyway. Someone else you don't know is Ric Allan, the Editor of that esteemed organ, Artscene. Nevertheless, I would love a picture of Ric to hang on my wall, or even to send to him for blackmail purposes. Perhaps your picture could depict Vinnie Allinn doing something out of the ordinary in the Artscene orifice; rollerblading, for instance, break-dancing, or torturing a goat. I will, of course, leave the finer details to you because I have no imagination whatsoever. Obviously. Yours Tiny Greenway I too have no imagination, so was compelled to draw the above image of Rictor masturbating into Sir Ernest Hall's hair to aid its glossy, full-bodied nature entirely from memory. Now you can listen to Sir Ernest Hall playing the complete piano works of Chopin HERE!